I hate mushrooms.

Ugh! I can taste the smallest fragment left behind on a slice of super-deluxe, double-deep-dish pizza. Every single one of my Chinese food orders ends with the phrase, “No mushrooms, please.”

I’ve tried them raw, sauteed, baked, and deep-fried stuffed with cheese. No sir, I do not like mushrooms.

At least not to eat.

I’m starting to like these foul fungi for another reason. It turns out that some of them, including the one whose splendiferous name graces the title of this article, can actually eat plastic.

You read that right. They consume plastic. It actually doesn’t surprise me. Mushrooms will eat anything, including feces. That’s generally where you find the most of them, actually. Ugh! Yet another reason to make sure they’re not included in my Kung Pao Chicken.

Students at Yale University ran across this nifty fungal feature back in 2012. This species of mushroom can live on a diet of polyurethane alone, grinding it down into purely organic matter while extracting everything it needs from the troublesome trash. Amazing.

This particular mushroom is rare, and it lives in the Amazonian rainforest. (It’s kind of interesting that an endangered environment packs a little built-in cleaning crew, huh?) Anyway, it does indeed eat plastic, as does some of it’s more common relatives.

The oyster mushroom, for example, can also eat plastic. And here’s the best part (or the worst part, if you are me): You can eat oyster mushrooms, even after they have gobbled up a bunch of empty milk jugs. You won’t be eating plastic, either (although I might rather). The mushrooms break the plastic down into completely organic, harmless matter.

Now, before you go out your back door and fling your Kroger bags and Twinkie wrappers willy-nilly into the breeze, calling, “Here, mushy, mushy!” take a moment to be realistic.

It takes time for our fungal friends to do their work. There’s a bunch of plastic out there along the roadsides and in the waterways and oceans. Clearly, we’re overindulging these garbage aficionados beyond their ability to consume. But, there could be practical ways to leverage this decidedly fastidious fungal feature. (I know. I’m getting carried away with the alliteration here, but it’s just so much fun.)

Some scientists have suggested that recycling centers around the world could farm mushrooms as a part of their plastic processing function. Mushroom-based recycling appliances could even find their way into homes, alongside your air fryer and whatever other kitchen fad you might have on your countertop.

So, I still hate mushrooms anywhere near my mouth, but maybe I’ll adjust my attitude about these organisms and their apparent ability to help mop up after us.

It makes me wonder. What else is out there in nature, ready and willing to help us out with the various challenges of human life? What other disgusting pizza toppings could be put to good use? I wonder if anchovies have any special abilities. Hmmm …

This article was written by Tilmer Wright, Jr. Tilmer is an IT professional with over thirty years of experience wrestling with technology and a proud member of the Authors Guild of Tennessee. In his spare time, he writes books.
You can find links to Tilmer’s books at the following location: https://www.amazon.com/s?i=stripbooks&rh=p_27%3ATilmer+Wright+Jr&s=rele…
His author information web site is here: http://www.tilmerwrightjr.com/