I seem to have dreams every time I go to sleep. Usually I don’t remember enough the next morning to tell them to anyone, though occasionally a few will linger in memory for a longer period.

A colleague of mine once told me that dreams are manifestations of our fears. This is an interesting theory, and I believe in some cases it is true. The Bible speaks of dreams as messages from God, though it doesn’t say this is the purpose of every dream. There are those who believe that our departed loved ones speak to us from beyond via dreams. Others think that dreams are our mind’s way of processing the events of the preceding day so they could be filed away or deleted from memory.

I am going to relate a few of my dreams to you, Faithful Reader, and see if you can derive any meaning from them.

I believe I could have been a bestselling novelist just like Stephen King if I had just forced myself to get out of bed and write some of the storylines of fantastic dreams I’ve had. I have on several occasions dreamed stories in three parts (always three parts, like a mini-series on television). I would not remember the first part the day after until several days later I revisited the story in part two. The first part would briefly again pass before my eyes, just like the introduction to the old Dallas episodes, and then the second part would develop. Some days later, the first and second parts would replay, just before I dreamed the third and final episode. Alas! I don’t remember a single one of those three part dreams, but I always knew when I was dreaming that a three part story was unfolding, and that it had concluded with the third and final part. Unlike Dallas, the parts of the dream never ended with a cliffhanger or clue as to what the next part would be.

Some time ago I dreamed I was a guest at the Trump White House. I don’t recall the occasion, though I was comfortable being there. I remember conversing briefly with the President. Mr. Trump was cordial, though somewhat distant, as if he were distracted. I shook his hand and wished him the best of luck as Chief Executive. He thanked me graciously and politely, then we each turned to other events. I don’t know what his next event was, but mine was wakefulness and wondering in that half-awake and half-asleep state if I had indeed met President Trump in the flesh!

I later dreamed that I had gone back in time. One of the former United States presidents was still in office, and he had offered something significant (in my dream it seemed to be in a monstrous black garbage bag) to possibly a foreign entity, or perhaps to Congress. The offering was very rudely not accepted. I was personally outraged at this snub of our president, and I found myself on Air Force One with the president and his wife on our way to right this wrong. My friend Eugene Brantley, dressed in a full suit of clothes, wearing a tie and blue blazer, accompanied me on this trip. To my knowledge the former president, first lady, Eugene and I were the only passengers on the plane. (Where was the Secret Service, and who was flying the plane?) The first lady was, as the old timers would say, “giving the president down the road”. I have no idea why she was so upset, but she raged at him for such a long time that I was sorry for him. I patted the president comfortingly on the shoulder as Eugene giggled like a kid. I kept nudging Eugene to stop laughing, but he couldn’t help himself. Finally the first lady went off to the side and continued raging to herself. I tried to console the president. When the first lady came back to rail some more, the president fell to his knees before her and begged forgiveness for whatever he had done, as Eugene continued giggling uncontrollably. Here my dream ended.

For those who feel politicians are akin to reptiles, I had another dream in which either an alligator or crocodile was crawling into bed with me. Just as it opened its massive jaws to chew me in half, I jerked my legs and woke myself. I had just enough presence of mind to hear my wife ask, “What are you doing?” It was just too much trouble to take off my CPAP facemask to reply.

Once I dreamed I flunked out of college. I had enrolled in a course and forgotten to attend a single class for the semester. It was time for the final exam, and I knew nothing about the course. I tried to get the professor to give me an incomplete so I could finish the course the following semester, but the professor would not hear of it and considered it an insult and indication of my worthlessness as a student and human being that I didn’t even think the class important enough to attend. I knew in my dream that I would not get my degree and was trying to figure out how to correct this disaster and face the disgrace I was bringing on myself. I awoke from this dream in that half-awake, half-asleep state and tried to convince myself that whatever my shortcomings might have been, I did indeed graduate and had the diploma to prove it.

I used to dream that I was standing on the ledge of a six story building (always six stories). I was facing the center of the flat roof when I felt myself begin to fall backward. I always jerked in my sleep and woke up. I have been told that if I had hit bottom I would have died in my sleep from a heart attack.

If any of you faithful readers have the vaguest idea of what these dreams might mean, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Perhaps an overactive imagination? A boring life? Subconscious insanity? I’ll just say this—reality is sometimes the greatest blessing life offers.

Next week I’ll share with you some of my more memorable episodes of eating at various restaurants.