I have a hard time wrapping my head around this, but in many countries, bugs are considered to be a delicacy. Did you know you can buy chocolate covered insects here in America? Maybe some of you have tried them and liked them. I’ve heard they are rather crunchy. As for me, the bugs I ate weren’t chocolate covered. And it wasn’t on purpose.

When I was kid, I loved riding my bike down the tall hill from Papaw’s barn. Talk about a fast ride. Most of my friends leaned forward when we sailed down the hill so they would be more aerodynamic. Not me. I stayed upright. I wanted to enjoy the wind hitting in my face full force and blowing through my hair. Even now, I’ll roll down my car windows so I can experience the force of the wind.

One day, I was zooming down the hill and suddenly I felt this sharp piercing pain on my tongue. I had been yelling to one of my friends, so I knew something had flown into my mouth. Instinctively, I bit down. I managed to stop my bike without crashing on the gravel driveway. I spit out to find half a sweat bee in my hand. I guess I ate the other half. My tongue hurt so bad that I didn’t notice swallowing it or how it tasted.

But I got a full taste of another bug not long after that.

I was watching TV at my grandparent’s house on a hot summer afternoon. Mamaw brought me a sandwich. I took a big bite and heard a loud crunch. Immediately, I had the worst taste in my mouth ever. It was disgustingly beyond words. I looked at my sandwich to see what was left of a winged insect. It must have landed on my sandwich about the instant I took a bite.

To this day, I have no idea what kind of insect it was. I really don’t care.

Needless to say, I spit out what was left of the bug and my bite of sandwich. Amazingly, I didn’t gag. Immediately, I sloshed and sloshed with Listerine. I even scrubbed my tongue with a paper towel.

My mamaw thought it was quite funny. I don’t think she would have felt that way if she had been the one who had bitten off half the bug. She did offer to make me another sandwich. At that point, I had no desire to eat anything, especially if it had any crunch.

It would be easier to say both of those insects were Kamikaze bugs, but they were just doing what some bugs do: flying around while looking for food. My mouth just happened to be open at the wrong times and the wrong places.

Let’s face it, if you live in our neck of the woods, you have to be on bug alert at all times. Since it’s so hot and humid in the south, we are blessed with bugs.

“And the same John had his raiment of camel’s hair, and a leathern girdle about his loins; and his meat was locusts and wild honey.” Matthew 3:4 (KJV)

How about that? Even John the Baptist ate bugs, except he used wild honey since he didn’t have modern chocolate. I do like honey too, but that isn’t enough for me to eat bug sushi.

By the way, I did some research. Did you know the term for eating bugs is Entomophagy? Now if you think you want to participate in entomophagy, here are some suggestions per health officials: ants, grasshoppers, butterflies, beetles, crickets, and stinkbugs.

You may want to try deep frying, but I doubt if they will be finger-licking good.