Leave it to me to make anything into a challenge; even something as sacred as Communion.

It started when I very, very young. My momma told me Communion was a commandment of Jesus (1 Corinthians 11:17-34) and I needed to be still and not to make any noise during it. In other words, I had to sit perfectly still. Boy, was that a struggle. I still remember resisting the temptation of moving because I didn’t want to disappoint Jesus.

My next challenge was the hard unleavened bread, which were in little squares. To say I loved that bread was and is an understatement. When the tray with bread came to me, I wanted to grab a handful. My momma would whisper, “Only take one.”

When I was little older, My Mamaw Jo and Papaw E.O. took on the responsibility of sitting up Communion the Saturday before. I would go with them. It was kinda cool having the church to ourselves. They would let me eat all the cracked pieces of bread since all of the squares in the trays had to be whole.

But I was unable to resist temptation, even inside the church. After all of the cracked pieces were gone, I would try to eat a whole piece or two when my mamaw and papaw weren’t looking. Needless to say, they caught me doing it and I didn’t get go back with them again.

My Communion challenge didn’t stop there.

I realized a new challenge the first time I was passed the tray with the little cups filled with grape juice. As a small child, my mom would hold the tray while I took out a glass. But now that I was older, I was expected to take the tray and get out my own glass.

When my mom handed me the tray, she said, “Use both hands. It’s heavy.” Then she let go of it. Oh my! I am sure my hands shook for a few seconds after she released her grip.

It went downhill form there. I realized I needed a hand to take out my cup. Being an awkward person, I wondered how in the world was I going to accomplish that feat without dropping the whole tray?

I broke out into a cold sweat. No exaggeration. I prayed so hard as I struggled to balance the heavy tray, get out my drink, and then pass the tray on to the next person. That happened at every Communion. As the juice tray headed toward me, I would always pray, “God, please don’t let me drop it,”

“Fear thou not, for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteous.” Isaiah 41:10 (KJV)

Looking back, I realize I prayed for the wrong thing. I prayed not to drop the juice tray instead of praying for the Lord’s strength. If I had done that, I probably would have enjoyed Communion so much more than I did. By relying on my own strength, I cheated myself out of a bigger blessing.

So now when I get the tray, I not only pray for the Lord’s strength, but I also hold it for other people next to me so they can get their juice cups. And I still only take one piece of bread.