“You can’t read a book here!”

“Why not?” I was totally (as mom would say) “befuzzeled.”

“Because you don’t read a book at a drag race!”

Tim’s answer made no sense to me. I grew up reading. I read anywhere and everywhere; even while riding in the car. That was until Mamaw Jo said, “I get motion sickness when I read in a car.” Once that thought was planted in my brain, I couldn’t read in the car anymore without feeling woozy.

But this was different. My husband was insulted that I had brought a book to the drag races. I simply couldn’t wrap my mind around it. “So what am I supposed to do then? This is boring!”

Now he was the one to be befuzzeled.

Basically, each of us had stepped on the other’s sacred ground. And we couldn’t comprehend why the other didn’t understand.

Tim had grown up around drag races and tractor pulls. He still loves engines and all kinds of vehicles. The louder they rumble, the more he wants to hear them. In his mind, books didn’t and still don’t belong in that world.

As for me, I bore very easily. Sitting there for hours on end and watching the same cars race over and over wasn’t my idea of an entertaining evening. Besides, while I was growing up, engines were only something my dad and papaw worked on and fussed over.

So what did I do? I crammed the book back into my purse. I could’ve read it anyway or I could’ve went to another seat and read, but how would’ve either one of those actions affected my relationship with Tim? To be honest, a book wasn’t worth it.

Don’t misunderstand this situation. Tim has made many more concessions for me over the years. For instance, he has often awkwardly held my purse while I tried on clothes in a department store. He has sat through many a Star Trek or dinosaur movie without a complaint. By the way, he can’t stand Captain Kirk. I could list much more.

Marriage is a give and take from both sides. One person can’t do all the giving and the other can’t do all the taking. That is not how you develop a happy and lasting marriage. It takes work on both parts, and most importantly, the Lord must be included in it.

This October Tim and I will have been married 34 years. We are now well aware of the other’s sacred grounds and we respect them. Just the other day, I was the one driving and I took a detour so we would stay behind a Mustang. Tim rolled his window down, stuck his head out, and listened to its engine rumble. He will also take a detour so we can drive by a house that has life-sized dinosaur statues in the front yard. He has even suggested us getting one too.

Wouldn’t it be awesome if we could find a statue of a dinosaur driving a race car? I would place it in front yard for all to enjoy.

“Wherefore receive ye one another, as Christ also received us to the glory of God.” Romans 15:7 (KJV).