I have the best idea for a new accessory: fashionable bibs for adults. I’m not joking. Imagine going to a highfalutin restaurant and being asked, “Would you also like a bib to go with your meal? Our latest ones are silk with sequins.” The sequins wouldn’t matter since you would still use the napkin to wipe your mouth.

Or maybe your bibs could be for everyday wear. You could personalize them with your favorite pictures or sayings on the front like a T-shirt or hat. Here’s a thought: they could be sold in matching sets like baby outfits.

Until adult bibs become popular, I’ll have to make do. When I’m at home, I tuck one of my small kitchen towels into the top of my blouse before I eat. Sometimes Tim will playfully tease me about it. It doesn’t bother me. At work, I tuck in paper towels. As for my co-workers, instead of teasing me, they sometimes follow suit and tuck in paper towels or napkin bibs too. They also know the pain.

What pain am I referring to? Dropping food or spilling drinks on clothing. Over the years, I have stained and thereby ruined countless pieces of clothing. It’s almost as if I’m a magnet for my runaway food. On the plus side of that, the floor beneath me isn’t cluttered with crumbs or other spillage.

Seriously, I don’t know how many times I have glanced down and seen a spaghetti noodle clinging to my shirt. That is especially aggravating when I am wearing something white or pastel. That blouse is then delegated as one of my “only worn in the house” clothes.

Then there are times when I am out in the public and other people spot stowaway food or drink stains on me: “Hey, did you know you got a spaghetti noodle on your shirt?” or “I think you dribbled some coffee on your pants.”

Of course everybody nearby has to turn and look at me. In my mind, I imagine what they’re thinking: She’s too old for that. Was she raised in a barn? Didn’t her mother teach her any better?

In all fairness, my mother tried and for a short while it worked. When I was very small, she called my nice clothes my pretties. “Be careful when you eat and drink. You don’t want to drop anything on your pretties and mess them up. If you do, then you won’t have them anymore.”

One fateful evening we were visiting a couple of my parents’ friends. They knew how much I loved to rock, so they bought a special rocking chair just for me. Somebody handed me a cola. In those days, they still came in glass bottles.

I sipped while I rocked. For some reason, I rocked so hard that my little rocking chair went over backwards. As I fell back, I somehow managed to keep that cola bottle upright. I didn’t spill a drop.

To this day, my parents’ friend likes to remind me of that almost every time he sees me. “I still remember you going over in that little rocking chair and holding that cola bottle up in air. You didn’t spill it because you didn’t want to get your pretties dirty.” This is actually similar to what happened to me in my story, “Don’t Spill the Tea.”

“Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.” 1Corinthians 10:31 (KJV)

You know, you don’t need to worry about doing everything perfectly or to please others. All you need to do is glorify God no matter what you are doing.

Maybe I should forgo bibs and get one of those cones of shame they put around animals’ necks. Of course, I would take it off when I went outside. That way I could praise the Lord as I watch the birds have a heyday while eating my runaway food.