The easiest way to find something lost around the house
is to buy a new replacement for it.

I traveled to Murfreesboro for a meeting last Wednesday evening. I attended the meeting and returned home the following evening.
On Friday morning I arose and proceeded to dress in old clothes to assist with the food distribution at Union County High School. As I was emptying pockets from the pants I wore on Thursday, I could not locate my checkbook.
I didn’t totally panic, though I was quite anxious. It was possible that I could have lost that checkbook anywhere between my house in route to and from Murfreesboro. That was a considerable amount of territory.
I did know that I drove without stopping on the return trip except for one stop at Monroe Cemetery in Maynardville to visit the grave of a recently buried friend. I returned there on Friday morning. I encountered an elderly gentleman who was mowing the cemetery. I asked him if he had come across a checkbook. He hadn’t, but took my name and number in case he should find it. I retraced my steps through the dew-covered graves to see if I could find it. I also looked all over the house, cars, roadside between the cemetery and home. No luck.
At last I decided I’d better go to the bank and cancel my checking account and open another. I tried to think when last I had written a check. Luckily, I do keep a computer list of my checking account, so that was easily identifiable. The bank teller was most helpful in helping me close and open the accounts.
Guess what? I found the checkbook on Saturday. It was in a pocket of the pair of pants I had picked out to wear to church on Sunday. I looked through all the clothes in the laundry, but never thought to look at the pair of pants hanging on my bedroom doorknob.
Now I am still in the process of having direct deposits and automatic deductions routed to the new account.
On another note, you might recall my article of a few weeks ago that concerned a credit card company that would not issue me a replacement card because the telephone number information they had on file did not match any number I could give them. This very day in the mail, several months after this occurred for the second time, I received the replacement card in the mail. It seems the expiration date is approaching, so the company has automatically reissued the card. As an old country song once said, “Gee, ain’t it funny . . .”
Into every life a little turmoil must come. May yours, Dear Reader, be infrequent and not too frustrating.

ANSWER TO QUESTION OF THE WEEK # 20
Perhaps your smartphone, maybe your TV, but something has definitely been collecting dirt on you for years. What is it? YOUR VACUUM CLEANER HAS BEEN COLLECTING DIRT ON YOU FOR YEARS

QUESTION OF THE WEEK # 20
What did the twins argue about? (See next week’s article in historicunioncounty.com for the answer.)

RANDOM THOUGHTS FOR AMUSEMENT

Of all things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

I don't always go the extra mile, but when I do, it's because I missed my exit.

Senility has been a smooth transition for me.
I'm at that age where my mind still thinks I'm 29, my humor suggests I'm 12, while my body mostly keeps asking if I'm sure I'm not dead yet.
I had amnesia once --- maybe twice.
It's not my age that bothers me - it's the side effects.
"First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down." - Leo Rosenberg

"The important thing to remember is that I’m probably going to forget." – Unknown

"As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." - Sir Norman Wisdom

Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers.

I came. I saw. I forgot what I was doing. Retraced my steps. Got lost on the way back. Now I have no idea what's going on.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.